****************
Why
Why did you do those things you swore you’d never do
Why did you say you were in love with me when you knew it wasn’t true
Why did you lie to me when you realized this wasn’t what you wanted
Did you think I wouldn’t see it in your eyes
Did you think you’d never be confronted
Did you think I wouldn’t walk away
When I found out what you did behind my back
When I found out what you did behind my back
You knew how I felt about those things
You did them anyway
There is no turning back
Written by G.,G.Rae
Ginger Gonzales
All Rights Reserved
****************
********************************************************************
********************************************************************
A Message for Nothing...
I woke up this morning
Not in the way you think
It was sobering to see my reflection today
So much so
It made me stop and think
When was the last time I was happy
When was the last time I had fun
Why do I feel like my life has ended
When it has only just begun
Why am I sad whenever you’re around me
Was there ever a time when we were glad
You get quieter everyday
And it tells me
That whatever it is you’re up to
It must be really bad
I feel guilty
I want to trust you
But I can’t
Because I know something’s wrong
You lie
You tell me you’re here for me
But the truth is
There has never been a time when you weren’t gone
Where am I when you look at me
Because I’m not there inside your eyes
I can see there is no love left for me inside of you
No matter how much you try to hide it
You thought you had your bases covered
You thought you’d never get caught
You made me feel guilty for not trusting you
And tried to blame me for all the times we fought
Why didn’t you leave
Why did you do the things you did
Did you think I wouldn’t find out
Or was the thought of me finding out the reason for it
All of the pain you caused me
All of the horror you caused the kids
Those memories will live with us forever
But I am so glad everyone knows who you are
And what you did
I can’t believe I ever allowed myself to love you
But that is a mistake I’ve fixed
I look at old pictures of my life before you
I will have that life for my kids
I will be the person I was before you again
No, stronger
Because she wasn’t strong enough not to let a nothing like you in
And I will live my life without hate for you
Because you are nothing
You don’t exist
Written by G.,G.Rae
Copyright © 2003
All Rights Reserve
********************************************************************
********************************************************************
...SPIN...
My heart is heavy
Filled with the memories of a past life
Filled with nonsense
Sadness & Anger
Laughter & Joy
Worry & Fear
Restlessness
Where did hope go
Why can’t I see ahead or plan
I am so tired
All I want to do is crawl up next to you and fall asleep
But next to you sleep won’t come
My head is full
It knows reason
It quietly speaks to my heart
They try to make sense of everything
But never do
Never agreeing on anything
Hearing
But not listening to what the other has to say
Fighting the truth
Swapping memories back and forth
Twisting things like a Rubik’s cube
I know I’m here somewhere
I am trying to find myself in ink to paper
Trying to make sense of the life that came before
Trying to make sense of you and I
Or maybe
Trying to finally hear something said long ago
Forever talking in circles are my heart and my head
Making me dizzy
Forever I spin
Never wanting to forget
But feeling cursed with this memory
I gave you a broken heart
Filled with fear and pain
But it still had hope
Happiness
It let you in
It loved all of your promises
It loved you
It planned
You knowingly kept yourself from me
You told me just enough so I wouldn’t know
Still my head knew the truth
Your eyes told it all
But my heart wouldn’t listen
It continued to fall
Expecting you to catch it
To catch me
Not just stand there and stare
Not to have you look through me
Like I wasn’t even there
Who were you think of
When you looked through me
When let me walk away
You helped me move
You let me go
Then you ask me to stay
You never told me anything
If I hadn’t asked
You wouldn't have said
Still
I know I don’t know everything
The rest is locked inside your head
You ask me what I’m thinking
But what I have to say you don’t want to hear
You shout at me to be quiet
To shut up
Because the truth is something you fear
But it’s something you must face
It’s something you already know
You can't hold on to something
You've already let go
My heart is heavy
Filled with the memories of a past life
Filled with nonsense
Sadness & Anger
Laughter & Joy
Worry & Fear
Restlessness
Where did hope go
Why can’t I see ahead or plan
I am so tired
All I want to do is crawl up next to you and fall asleep
But next to you sleep won’t come
My head is full
It knows reason
It quietly speaks to my heart
They try to make sense of everything
But never do
Never agreeing on anything
Hearing
But not listening to what the other has to say
Fighting the truth
Swapping memories back and forth
Twisting things like a Rubik’s cube
I know I’m here somewhere
I am trying to find myself in ink to paper
Trying to make sense of the life that came before
Trying to make sense of you and I
Or maybe
Trying to finally hear something said long ago
Forever talking in circles are my heart and my head
Making me dizzy
Forever I spin
Never wanting to forget
But feeling cursed with this memory
I gave you a broken heart
Filled with fear and pain
But it still had hope
Happiness
It let you in
It loved all of your promises
It loved you
It planned
You knowingly kept yourself from me
You told me just enough so I wouldn’t know
Still my head knew the truth
Your eyes told it all
But my heart wouldn’t listen
It continued to fall
Expecting you to catch it
To catch me
Not just stand there and stare
Not to have you look through me
Like I wasn’t even there
Who were you think of
When you looked through me
When let me walk away
You helped me move
You let me go
Then you ask me to stay
You never told me anything
If I hadn’t asked
You wouldn't have said
Still
I know I don’t know everything
The rest is locked inside your head
You ask me what I’m thinking
But what I have to say you don’t want to hear
You shout at me to be quiet
To shut up
Because the truth is something you fear
But it’s something you must face
It’s something you already know
You can't hold on to something
You've already let go
~ Spin ~
Written by G.,G.Rae
Copyright© 2010
Ginger Gonzales
Written by G.,G.Rae
Copyright© 2010
Ginger Gonzales
All Right Reserved
No comments:
Post a Comment